Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
