I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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