hell yes lets make some ravioli
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
