I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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