we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
