Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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