so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
