Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
After last night, I could never be a politician.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
