I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
