he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
