we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize