walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
