You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Randomize
