First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
