That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Randomize
