The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
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