You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
