i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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