She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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