I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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