Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
