Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Randomize