In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
