shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
