i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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