just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
