What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
In America we eat man semen.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize