At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
