when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize