he wants to bone in the snuggie
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
