he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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