Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
