i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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