Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize