do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Just pee around me
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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