we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Randomize