used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
