she looked like the before picture.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
