is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
