I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
