We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
