don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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