Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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