He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
