dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
