before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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