doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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