Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize
