I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
