i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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