It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
