4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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